BB7 - We ARE Chill Town!

Good to see that Jules isn't shying away from horrific fashion choices as the season nears its end. Looks like she reached deep into her closet for the full-fledged dominatrix look once again. Maybe she thinks that her crazy outfits will draw attention away from the fact that she has to put all of her effort into reading the teleprompter and not flub her lines.

 

One of the 101 things that suck about Erika being HOH is that we have to see even more of her than usual. Why is this chick still in the house? Seriously. Of course, this also gives her more opportunity to look like a giant ass. Like when she's in the Diary Room saying "This is Big Brother, who can you trust but yourself?" Um, Erika, haven't you put every single one of your eggs in Mike Boogie's basket? If that isn't trusting someone other than yourself, I don't know what is.

 

Will and Boogie continue to control the house of lemmings, giving each of them honorary memberships to Chill Town. They gave their identical secret ninja move speeches to Erika, Janelle, and even Chicken George, and each of them ate it up like it was there first meal on a slop pass. Of course, I think George was more excited about the prospect of getting a Chill Town t-shirt. What? Is that toast popping out of the toaster?! Whoaaaaa!!!!

 

While we are on the subject of the chicken man, leave it to George to fully embrace the absurdity of asinine outfits the folks over at CBS have gotten him to wear. He shows up to the eviction ceremony wearing his giant green sunflower leotard outfit, the Santa hat, and has his face painted like Ronal freaking McDonald. Oh, his family must be so proud. Bet his kids can't wait for the first day of school. No humiliation there at all. I mean, come on George. Have some dignity. Please.

 

Anyway, the houseguests vote and to no surprise, Danielle is evicted. And she apparently had a huge change of attitude as well. Suddenly, she is seemingly fine with being evicted and is all about voting for the strongest player...as long as that player isn't Erika. Once evicted, Danielle has to face the only thing worse than eviction, and that is the insipid conversation with Jules and her annoying questions. When Jules plays the tape of messages from the house guests, they are all surprisingly sincere...except for Erika. Erika uses this as an opportunity to once again make it all about her and how hurt she is that Danielle won't vote for her if she is in the final two. Are you kidding me? Yet another point scored in the Erika is a giant ass competition.

 

Total side note: Will + jeans = Totally Adorable. I totally hearted him in that HOH competition. Love him.

 

Um, does Janelle have a hicky on her chest? What is that?? I'm assuming it is from all the time she has spent "strategizing" with Will. Either that or she got in a fight with the vacuum cleaner hose. Oh Will, while I like Janelle, she just isn't good enough for you. However, if hooking up with her will make you take her to the final three and kick Erika to the curb, by all means, go right ahead.

 

So, Janelle wins HOH, but it might as well have been Will. Because, he told her exactly what to do and she did exactly what he told her. Classic.

 

The elation of Janelle winning HOH was quickly spoiled when Erika won POV. Are you kidding me? Will was so close, but somehow this idiot wins. And she attributes it to her pilates, "A little pilates goes a long way." Huh? How exactly does the Sun Dog Down pose help you in untying stupid knots. Once back in the living room, Jules gives Erika the opportunity to say something to the house guests after winning the POV. A stunned Erika stammers, "Uh, I don't have anything to say." Of course you don't, b/c no one told you what to say. And Jules, can we not give her anymore opportunities to speak than necessary. I mean, I think we've all seen and heard enough from Erika to last a life time.

 

So, with Erika off the block, Janelle puts up Boogie and George goes home. Jules tried to add as much drama as she could, with her "What will they do?" "How will they vote?"  It was painfully lame really. George clearly saw the writing on the wall. It was great when he and Boogie pretty much hijacked the show from Jules, saying good-bye before the eviction was announced. Once Jules scolded them for hugging, she announced the obvious, that George was out. He laughs his idiotic laugh (can the man say anything without laughing??) and says, "I'm cool". Enough with the I'm Cool George. You are 47 years old. It just sounds lame. And, btw, how is George only 47? Are you kidding me? I thought the guy was at least 50 something! As George leaves he tries to gather up his sunflower outfit. Yeah, that's worth taking home. I'm sure the wife would love seeing you stroll around the house in that get up. Boogies shouts his new catch phrase, "You're a class act" with about as much sincerity as Anna Nicole Smith crying at her 96 year old billionaire husbands funeral, and then he promises George Budweisers at Dolce. Way to get another plug in there boogie.

 

Once out on the couch with Julie, George is "honored" with a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken and the real, fake Cornel Sanders. My guess is that George doesn't realize the real Cornel Sanders is dead, and he is once again flabbergasted. While on the couch, Jules uses the term "roller coaster ride" for about the 86^th time this episode alone. Someone get this chick a thesaurus or a book of 1,000 clichés quickly please!

 

Inside the house, Erika babbles something about being the black and white Jase, while the rest of the house guests completely ignore her.  This girl has got to be voted out on Tuesday! Enough already!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BB7 - Go upstairs and give her a hug...

After this week's nominations, everybody seems to be having a case of overconfidence-itis, with the exception of Janelle. It appears that Janelle is the only house guest to realize that she could go home at any minute. George goes as far as to say that he doesn't mind being in the hot seat, b/c he realizes he is a pawn. What George doesn't realize is that he may be safe this week, but that the hot seat may soon turn him from pawn into rotisserie chicken. George spends his time on the block doing what he does best, being flabbergasted at anything and everything. He is in complete awe of Chill Town and how they have come so far. "How is that possible?!" a baffled George cries. Well Georgie, it's possible because they ARE Chill Town and they are great manipulators. News flash, that's how you win this game. Of course, it helps if the rest of the house guests are completely blinded by the force that is Chill Town and voluntarily keep them safe. Though I'm not complaining, b/c I want to see these two go to the finals together. Go Team Chill Town! And to paraphrase my boys, if loving them is wrong, I don't want to be right.

I have to give it to Janelle, the girl can act. Either that or Erika is the most gullible person on the face of the planet. How did she not see through Janelle's "I want to work with you, I'm glad we're back on the same side" charade. I mean, "back" on the same side? At first, I thought Erika saw right through her. In the diary room as she stroked her chin, pondering Janelle's offer, I was sure she was going to see through the ruse. But no. Hook, line, and sinker, Janelle caught her a fish and that fish is Erika. Erika then made another tactical error by pretty much telling Danielle that she was safe no matter what. In fact, she told her last week directly after the HOH competition. Big mistake. Huge! I wouldn't mess around with Danielle. I know she's been doing a lot of tough talk these past couple weeks without much to back it up, but something tells me the girls still got some fight left in her. And when she swore on her kids to Erika, you just knew that Erika’s word was as good as, well slop. Danielle may get voted out, but if Erika makes it to the finals, her votes are dwindling by the minute.

Um, and when did "scum bagged" become the new back doored? Is it just a mega-back door? B/c I thought back doored was basically the end all and be all worse thing you could do to someone. That is besides throw them under the bus. Anyway, the term scum bagged was thrown around last week, and this week it is back with a vengance, mainly used by Danielle.

I am so glad that the trampoline, or pimp-o-line, turned out to just be so good old wholesome fun and not a new place for Boogie and Erika to display their ongoing showmance. I mean, does it get any cuter than Will jumping on a trampoline with the exuberance of a five year old on Christmas morning? I submit that it CANNOT!

Speaking of Christmas, this week it is Christmas in August. And instead of sugarplums dancing in his head, Will was dreaming, as he always does, of hanging out with Neal Patrick Harris. And who should show up on Christmas, none other than NPH himself. Will was beside himself, to the point of suggesting security may be necessary for Mr. Harris, likening himself to a stalker. But Will just can't contain himself as he joyfully wonders, "First the trampoline, then NPH, what's next? I win this show?!" Side note: I think I have to start watching How I Met Your Mother. I mean, if Will is a fan, and from the commercial NPH seems a lot like Will, how could this show not be must see tv?

No, no, no, no, no, no, NO! Haven't we seen enough of uncomfortable George situations? Is it necessary take the low hanging fruit of fat jokes and put the man in a Santa costume? Anyway, George and NPH dole out the gifts, which pretty much seem to be clothes. But, this is not a bad thing. Obviously NPH and I are on the same page. Enough with the Dolce t-shirt. Really! George seemed awestruck by his new sneakers that had a star on them. Wow. Apparently the whole Converse fad that seems to reappear every 10 years or so has passed George by about five times. After last night's episode, I'm convinced that George is in a state of shock and awe every time he sees toast pop out of a toaster.

So, in the gym, which this season is pretty much strictly used for strategizing and talking, we learn a little something about George that explains a LOT. Apparently, George was struck by lightening several years back. Literally struck by lightening. As Boogie said, if you've been struck by lightening already, you're pretty much SOL for any other one in a million type chance to come your way. Count your days George. Count your days.

Boogie has apparently moved into the HOH room with Erika. No surprise there. Before retiring for the night, Erika wants to talk to seconds of game. Puh-lease. That's about all the game the girl has to talk. She tells Boogie that Will has to go up. Will quickly poo-poos this plan and pretty much tells Erika what she needs to do. That is, Danielle has to go up and go home. Ruh-roh!

When it's time for the POV competition, Boogie is up first. And with the red, white, and blue sweat band with matching wrist bands, he looks like he is ready for the 1972 Summer Olympics. While Erika doesn't look like she is going for the gold during the POV competition, she does look like she stepped out of 1985 with her baby blue butterfly clip piled in a funky mess, ala Debi Gibson, on top of her head. Well, at least the girl put some clothes on for the competition. B/c I'm pretty much done with the bikini-as-an outfit deal she's had going. We learn during the POV competition that being struck by lightening pretty much erases one’s short term memory, or maybe it was the weight of the chicklet necklaces cutting off oxygen to his brain. Whatever it was, George might as well have played the POV competition blind folded. And then there was Janelle, who despite having to constantly hold the microphone into the back of her pants with one hand still managed to kill everyone else’s time and win POV.

After the POV competition, we get about 32 clips of Danielle telling us she believes that she is safe. If we have learned anything, this is a clear sign that she is dunzo. Which begs the question, does Danielle not see what's going on around her in the way of constant E-Boogie one-on-one time? You would think this might be a little clue to her as to why Erika is so loyal to Chill Town. But, maybe Danielle has been to busy with all her trash talk time in the Diary Room to notice all the canoodling that goes on.

Along with the endless "I'm confident that I'm safe" clips from Danielle, we are also bombarded with about 28 minutes of Erika whining about her dilemma, describing it is a tough decision. Um, isn't that kind of the gist of the word dilemma? Well, let's just be thankful she didn't beat the phrase "stuck between a rock and a hard place" to death. Small favors. But one thing is for sure, if Erika wants to ensure some more Boogie-time, she best not be putting up Will! At least Erika stopped trying to act like the queen of strategy this week, basically coming out and saying that she needs people like Will and Boogie to tell her what to do. Maybe this will ease up the one thousand and one shots of Erika ringing her hands through her hair. Hey, maybe that hideous butterfly clip isn't such a bad thing.

Once Danielle realizes the deal, she does what any other person would do and takes this as the perfect opportunity to hit the sauce. And to my surprise, this girl can booze it up with the best of them. Nothing like a nice little wine buzz to bring out the true feelings. Stumbling over words she warns a child like Chicken George huddled in a towel clutching what seems to be a life vest, that Erika is evil and Chill Town is bad. Getting no reaction from George, she hauls herself out of the pool and confronts Erika, who pretty much laughs her off. Then Danielle pull out the big guns and plays the hurt card. Even drunk off her ass, the girl knows how to play hardball.

Once back inside Erika goes directly to Will, not sure where Boogie was when this all went down. But Will locks himself in the HOH room with Erika for the night while a drunk-ass Danielle constantly rings the doorbell trying to get Erika to let her in. Clearly the girl is blotto. Eventually she gives up and goes to bed. The next morning, the white zinfandel hangover has set in and we see Danielle sporting a pair of Maui Jims to hide the bloodshot eyes.

No surprise, Janelle uses the POV on herself. She gives a nice little speech saying how she hates having to put others in harms way. At this point George points to himself. Um, George, you are already on the block. Just sit there and be quiet. And then the expected happens and Danielle is nominated by who I can only assume is her ex-best friend Erika. Sitting up on the block, Danielle looks stone cold pissed. Erika better hope that she goes home, b/c if not Erika will be lucky to even make it to the Jury House. Because at this point, Danielle looks like she wants to take her into the kitchen and drown her in a bucket of slop.

So, not only were we treated to a Will/Boogie dance segment, the ring-ring is also back!! Oh how I missed it! I just hope that this week's double eviction keeps our boys safe so that we have the opportunity for that dance/ring-ring montage I've been praying for!

BB7 - Whoa, whoa, whoa, put the breaks on that one sweetheart!

And the week of Erika as HOH begins with her screaming like Xena the Warrior Princess in the Diary Room, "I won HOHHayayayay!" She goes on to say that James had to go, b/c he was one of the strongest competitors. "You've gotta get those stronger players out of here." Well, if that's the case, Erika could actually win this thing. Because I think those furry little tarantulas have more of a game plan than you do. Isn't it great how she tries to talk like she has all these great strategies and is a really tough player, when really, I don't think she understands half of what she is doing? She blindly does what other people tell her to, not really understanding the reasons. Every once in awhile you see the light bulb moment when she actually comprehends the logic behind getting rid of someone. But, those moments, I'm afraid, are few and far between. I mean, how else can you explain that she still thinks she is part of Chill Town and has no clue that Boogie is manipulating the crap out of her? Yes, I'm afraid that those light bulb moments are growing dimmer and dimmer by the day.

While we are on the subject of my favorite house guest, nice HOH room. Well, I guess I can't say it is dull. I really can't put it any better than Will; it does look like a florist had an epileptic seizure in that room. You know that no one gave a crap about seeing her HOH room when she sang, "Who wants to see my HOH room, la la la?" (Why does she have to say everything in that stupid sing song voice? Why?) Will couldn't come up with anything to say except what an ugly group of people the Season 4 cast was; love how he didn't exclude Erika from that description. As everyone except for Danielle files out of the room, we are treated to Erika jumping around in circles like an idiot, with no clue the gravity HOH brings at this point in the game. Danielle tries to have a serious conversation with her, trying to figure out why Janelle voted for James. But poor little Erika just can't seem to grasp why this even matters. Her little world right now is focused on her hideously flowered room and her plans to deflower it as soon as possible with her "ally" Mike Boogie.

Speaking of which, Erika displayed her naiveté when it comes to game play when she suggested to Boogie that she might nominate Will. I mean, is she a complete dolt? Boogie and Will. Will and Boogie. Chill Town. Business Partners. Um, the list goes on and on, so why on earth would she think that Boogie would go for getting rid of Will even before the final five? She then pressures Boogie into naming his allegiance. In that special Boogie way, he artfully dodges the question, confusing Erika. Who like a puppy who goes chasing after a ball you've only pretended to throw, blindly follows Boogie's diversion and lets the question go.

Boogie seems to have cut back adding extra syllables to words. But, he did bust out with his own special Boogie way of expressing his amazement when Janelle won at poker, screaming, "Boolya Cashalaka Boo!" See, it's little things like this that make love Boogie. I mean, who else could pull that off in this house? He wasn't quite so good humored about it as Janelle pretty much opened a can of whoop-ass on the table during their poker tournament. I'm afraid my dear Boogies ego was slightly bruised. No worries, I'm sure Erika will be right there to massage it back to its over inflated, yet irresistible state of Boogieness.

Chicken George got some quality on air time this episode...unfortunately for us, the majority of it was spent in either form fitting spandex that left nothing to the imagination or some other form of undress. His credo as Belly Flop King may be that he's got the girth and got the worth, but please, please, please put your shirt back on. The repetitive loop of CG running from the house to the pool with his arms akimbo and then hurling himself face first into the water was possibly the worst time filler yet this season.

Once George finished flailing himself into the pool, Will and Janelle use it to get down to some serious flirt time. Janelle claims that the flirting is just fun and passes the time in the house. But, will she be susceptible as Will puts on his sexiest voice and his come hither eyes? "When you say 'hate' do you mean 'loooove'"? But in seriousness, I think these two are all about the showmance and goofing around. Unlike Erika and Boogie, where Boogie thinks that Erika is falling in love with him, despite his alter ego, Lance Showmance...who I must say is a freaking genius.

When it's time to announce the Food Competition, not only does Erika sing "It's time for the food competition, la la la", but she also skips through the room like a crazy person. Speaking of crazy people, for this competition, everyone gets to dress up to look like they pretty much escaped from the loony bin: giant sunflowers, buzzing bees, and the strangest looking birds I ever have seen. As if the Chicken George belly flop scenes weren't enough for one day, we are treated to George in a bright green spandex body suit. And in this body suit, George has to jump on the other house guests to squeeze nectar from their costumes. Where do they come up with these challenges? I mean, CBS must have an entire team dedicated to "Let's see what other humiliating thing we can get these folks to do for money". And I have to say, that even though George in the body suit was disturbing, especially when he referred to Will as Dr. Delicious right before mounting him, it was nothing compared to Erika basically humping (I hate this word, but nothing else fits...sorry) Boogie in order to drain him of his nectar. Yeah, after that, I have a feeling nectar isn't all that was drained from poor Boogie. And then Erika laments about how her mother is going to just die, as if that is the first embarrassing thing the girl has done. Um, let's not forget about the bathtub shenanigans from last week sweetie. And now that the house has a trampoline, I'm sure that Erika will be eager to show Boogie her flexibility and bounciness on that thing. Let's keep the cameras away from the trampoline. Please, for all that is good, please.

The highlight of the episode had to be Will as he made love to the camera in the back yard. "Come here, give me a little kiss." "You're naughty, you're naughty." "If I were to rearrange the alphabet, I would but U and I together." I mean, even when this guy is at the height of cheesiness, he is still absolutely charming. Ah yes, after wooing the cameras as only Will can do, I think a whole new legion of Dr. Delicious fans were born. After a brief, but tragic break up with the camera, Will goes running back to it, begging for forgiveness and for it to take him back.

George feels left out because he hasn't been invited to any of the secret alliance meetings. Which should make him wonder, "If I'm not invited to the meetings, maybe I'm really not in an alliance." But, George, still reveling in his one-week slop pass, doesn't get the hint. Let's just hope your around to enjoy that slop pass for a week and not on a permanent slop pass in the Jury House. When it's time for the nominations, Erika explains to the group how she lost a lot of sleep the previous night trying to make the decision. Um, yeah. You may have lost a lot of sleep, but I have a feeling your time was occupied with other Boogie type things rather than tough decision making. She goes on about how she is an emotional person and an emotional player, blah, blah, blah. Can we just get to the nominations already without the drama? Janelle and George are nominated. Janelle expects it fully. George does not. George does his obligatory, "aw shucks" head bob mope.

Once the nominations are announced, Erika starts bestowing Janelle with compliments about her game play and how great she is and that's why she was nominated. I guess that sounds better than, "I nominated you because Boogie and Danielle told me to." But, at this point in the game, why can't the nominations just be left alone? Why do they have to be immediately followed up by butt-kissing to the nominees? You can't tell me that Erika has thought far enough ahead that she is trying to secure votes for whoever gets sent to the jury.

BB7 - If I've Heard it Once, I've Heard it a Thousand Times...

As I closed my eyes last night, I said a little prayer that once again, Erika would be stripped of her title as head of household. But alas, it looks like the only stripping she will be doing is for the amateur porn flick she's been shooting with Boogie in the HOH bathtub. Didn’t we get enough of these two last week? I mean, I knew the chances of the HOH winner being nullified due to a technical technological difficulty again were slim, especially when there really wasn’t any technology involved. But, with this group you never know. Something as simple of stepping up or stepping down can prove challenging. I mean, they were blindfolded after all.

George and James are on the block. George doesn’t seem to concerned about the nominations. He tells us he isn’t stressing and is going to be his normal, everyday self. Lucky us.

And like George, James doesn’t seem too worried either. Actually, James doesn’t seem worried at all. And we know this, b/c those hot shot editors were back at work over there at CBS, pulling together every possible clip of James announcing how confident he was that he was safe and everything was still on track. Well James, they were still on track. Unfortunately, just not the same track that your caboose was chugging along on. But hey, way to keep your chin up when talking to Jules after the eviction. You say your were glad to go out this way? And that you were beaten by the best. At least I think that's what you said. You might have wanted to repeat those two things just one more time, just so everybody got it. All together, "You were beaten by the best." Um, and getting to work with Will and Danielle was an amazing accomplishment? Amazing accomplishment? Wow. Setting the bar that high James, how will you ever be able to achieve anything else. Uh, yeah.

Now, we all know the magic of editing and that the editors piece together bits of material to make it the most interesting. It’s call Reality Television, where in 99% of the cases, the “reality” should always be in quotation marks. Apparently, James missed this memo. Because half of the time he spent with Julie, when he wasn’t saying that he was beaten by the best, he spent complaining that the right footage wasn’t shown and that he didn’t know what show America was watching. James, just in case you didn’t realize this, America didn’t vote you out. Your house mates did. And I’m pretty sure they aren’t subject to the freestyle editing that makes it into the actual episodes.

Speaking of editing, how long does it take to peel an orange? And when peeling an orange, does it ever peel itself back together? Just asking. Other than the orange, the highlight of this scene was when Danielle, seemingly at her wits end with stupidity, tried to explain to Erika why she was having such a tough time with the vote between James and George. "No, that is not it Erika", which you know she wanted to follow with "you dumbass". But, if I had to sit there and listen to yoga-girl go on and on about what a tough choice this was, I probably would have been at my breaking point too. Actually, I would have snatched the peeled/unpeeled orange out of hand and beamed her in the noggin.

How is it that Danielle has not seen through James' shockingly thin guise. I mean, she seems like she’s a pretty smart cookie and has her wits about her. So, why is she still trusting this guy? Granted, she shouldn't just blindly believe Will when he tells her that James is "double-dipping", but if she would just think for a minute, she'd realized that James was full of it. If you ask me, she should have abandoned the Legion of Doom after they all crapped out on her in the POV competition a couple weeks back.

I'm so glad that Marcellus hung on long enough to be part of the BB7 jury. Because I really didn't get enough of that bathrobe all season long. And what is with the whining Marci? You are on some sort of tropical island in a gorgeous house, and it is the worst experience of your life? Your own personal hell? Enough with the drama, you're in the house by yourself. Just shut up, put on your white robe and sleep mask, and drink a freaking Mai Tai. Although, once Howie arrived in the house, I actually started to feel bad for Marcellus. He should have spent less time complaining during his week of solitude on the island and more time enjoying it. Because once Howie lumbered through the doorway, any sort of non-annoying peace was over. "How annoying will these idiots be with an infinity pool?" You have no idea Marcellus. No idea. So, as Howie arrives, we see a montage of Howie being, well Howie. And then I can't help but think, poor, poor Marjealous. I mean Marcellus.

Will confronts Boogie about Chill Town and the two dames that he fears could break them up. I'm really surprised Boogie didn't jump all over this with the fear of him and Will breaking up. I mean, talk about his world shattering around him. But, he didn't. He stood up for Erika, while Will championed for Janelle. I really hope they are both just playing each of these chicks in order to make it to the finals. And when they start comparing them to Yoko Ono, I think that has to be case. Please. I'm having a hard enough time tolerating the E-Boogie make out scenes, if he had true feelings for her…oh, I don’t even want to think about it. Must find happy place.

With the double eviction this week, I have officially reached my limit of Julie Chen. With her annoying questions and odd vocal inflections, emphasizing words that don't need to emphasized, and then trying to make everything more dramatic than necessary...ugh. At the eviction ceremony, she asks the nominees to speak their final pleas. Now, we've pretty much established that George is one annoying cat. But, put him in a sombrero using phrases like "cool beans", well that's just whole new levels of annoying. Seriously, we are talking record setting levels here. And then we learn that James is evicted, cue the shocked, mouth agape George face, only now, it’s complemented by a goofy-ass sombrero. Though, I did kind of feel bad for George though when Julie lured him with the thoughts of fried chicken and beer, b/c he really thought he was getting it right then. Shame on Julie for teasing a man whose been eating slop for a week. Though, knowing her, she probably didn't mean to tease him, she probably just read her cue cards wrong.

So, Erika wins the POV this week, and it looks like she is going to get to keep it this time. When she won, we were treated to her signature combination girlie scream, hands in the air, and a hair flip. Tough combination to pull off, but she did it. And I’m sure that was only a minor fraction of what we are in store for this week…Again I say, lucky us.

BB7 - And the award for the biggest cry baby goes to...

So, apparently every time someone gets evicted, it’s hard on poor old James…no matter how many times he twisted the knife in their back. Howie is gone and we are once against subject to bleeding-heart James acting his most heartfelt in the diary room, lamenting about how hard it is to see him go. Whatever James. Why hasn’t this guy been evicted yet? Can someone tell me that? Please.

Then there is George, who is all proud of himself for taking out his Jedi Master Howie. The only thing worse than a whiney George is a cocky George. Get over yourself. Really, all you did was nominate him, thinking he wouldn’t be evicted. When it comes down to it, Chill Town “took him out”, not you Chicken George. While we are on the subject of the chicken man, he better not win. It’s bad enough that we have been subject to his woe-is-me act this long. But, if he makes it to the end, we will have to hear how it was really his strategy all along. And you know he’ll cry if he wins. You just know it. Pluck this guy out of the house pronto.

And finally there is Erika, who after Howie’s eviction asks in disbelief, “What the hell am I still doing here?” Good question Erika. The funniest thing is that she thinks she is all safe b/c of her “alliance” with Boogie. When, in fact, Boogie doesn’t really give a crap about her and I doubt he will have any trouble kicking her to the curb. And maybe if she wasn’t so it’s all about me all of the time, she would realize that she is being played by Boogie big time. And what was she talking about Howie being in her face all the time? Um, Erika, much like the rest of the house, Howie gave you about as much attention as a potted plant.

By the way, loved Howie trying to get all ghetto with Boogie as he was leaving the house, calling him a punk and whatnot. Poor, poor Howie. He tries so hard, but just can't seem to get it right.

Let’s just talk about Boogie and his shirts for a second. A) Once again with the flaming red lips. (Though, with the cracker jack editing team at CBS, they were probably just clips from when he wore it the last time.) B) Nice plug for your restaurant group, Dolce. (Actually, pretty smart move. On second thought, I'm all about Team Boogie promoting his restaurants.) C) Um, apparently now Boogie is wearing Will's clothing? One minute Will is wearing the Le Deux shirt and next thing you know, Boogie's wearing it, secretly wishing that his le deux would be completed by Will. Thought bubble over Boogie’s head says Will + Boogie = Le Deux. I guess this explains why he kept saying that "we" got the HOH room, rather than "I". I think Boogie is hoping for a little Will/Boogie snuggle time in the HOH room.

So, Janelle is pretty much devastated by Howie's leaving, or so she wants the other house guests to believe. Actually, I think she's more pissed that she was totally back-stabbed (or as Will says, front stabbed) by Chill Town. And Chicken George, in his constant battle to keep everyone happy, plays the role of creepy, annoying camp counselor and gives Janelle a little pep talk. My only question is how she kept a straight face through it all. "You're beautiful, intelligent, have a glowing-ass smile...you have everything" blah, blah, blah. George is followed by Will, who gives a much funnier speech, though I was slightly distracted by the enormous tag sticking out of his shirt. But seriously, how can you not love this guy? Just ask Boogie.

So, Janelle clues George in on how the rest of the house guests aren’t really his buddies, and this seems to shock him. Not the smartest chicken in the henhouse there, are you pal. This gives George the idea to “shake things up”. And so, the Janelle/Chicken George alliance is born. I don’t like this alliance. Not one bit. If Janelle doesn’t start playing for herself and herself alone, she’s going to find herself in the dreaded Julie Chen hot seat with her sad little black bag. Not to mention, I don’t need to see George groveling to her and trying to strategize like he is some integral player in the game. Blech. Yeah, nothing good can come of this.

Okay, George might be the most annoying person ever, but James is the biggest crybaby EVER. I mean, come on James. His knickers were all in a bunch over the POV competition and Janelle's "poor sportsmanship". Are you serious? James is in an alliance with pretty much everyone in the house. Lying is freaking second nature to this guy. How is that for sportsmanship? But, he goes on and on and on and on about how Janelle kicked him, caused him harm, and assaulted him. You can't tell me that James wouldn't have thrown Janelle off a cliff to get that doll if he had the opportunity. James, you cut your hand and got beat by a girl. Get a band-aid for your boo-boo and shut up.

We haven't had a Chill Town ring-ring segment in awhile, which makes me sad. But, last night we got the Will/Boogie dance combo as they reveled in the POV victory and their control of the house. And let's face it, Will jumping up and down in tube socks doing his goofy little dance is just about as good as the ring-ring shtick. As Boogie tries to dupe the house into believing that he is upset about Janelle's POV win, he proves to us that he is the worst actor ever. Seriously, stick to the restaurant business Boogie. I mean who on earth would buy his I'm-so-pissed-storming-out-of-the-room act? Oh wait, Erika's there. She'll believe it. Funniest part of the show is when Erika declares to the camera that she knows that Boogie really wanted Janelle to go. Did he? Really? This girl is an idiot. But, if she has to be on the show, a note to the editors: Keep up the good work of making her look like a giant ass. Granted, she pretty much takes care of that herself.

Speaking of idiots, once James finished crying about the POV competition, he gave a nice little speech in the diary room about how he knew he was safe from eviction with Boogie as HOH. "There's not a scenario that does not play out well for me." Are you sure James? Really? I have a feeling that as of Thursday, we won't be seeing you again till the final episode. And after that you will be relegated to Reality Show history. But, hey, look on the bright side James. At least with tonight’s episode, CBS has enough to do an entire segment in the Special Features section of the DVD on you crying like a little girl who got her dolly taken away. And, let’s face it, that’s pretty much what happened.

"Under the bus" is the new "Backdoored"

Viewers Note:
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Okay, CBS needs to stop letting their summer interns do their film editing, b/c this out of sequence crap is getting ridiculous. I mean, the séance and glam-rock video being out of sequence were one thing, but now we are putting "never before seen" footage in the "Previously on BB7" segment? WTF? What am I talking about? The Boog-E kiss of course. All of a sudden it's like we've known about it all along. When in reality, just last week I was thinking mama Boogie had completely lost it when she started talking about the E-Boogie alliance. Now, on to the recap...
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Well, it didn't take long for the "I was HOH and it was ripped away from me" whining to begin. Erika, you were HOH for all of five minutes. Get over it. And while you're at it, please never say the word "despise" again. It's bad enough that Boogie is destroying the English language one word at a time with all his extra syllables, we don't need your annoying over pronunciation of the later S over and over and over again. I mean is this what they have to resort to in order to get any sort of Erika footage on the show? Is that all they could scrap together? Oh, that and some obviously old footage of her and Boogie bed making out. Remind me again why she is an All Star? Oh, that's right, for the drama factor, since the producers clearly knew that her and Boogie had been "hanging out" outside. But, it looks like our little Boogie is just using Erika and this showmance to further his own game (and to get a little action on the side). I don't know why, but there is just something I like about Erika looking like a giant ass. I mean, it's not like she is some naive college co-ed. The chick is pushing 40. So, I say, Go Team Boogie!

Again with the white robe and sleeping mask Marcellus?! Seriously, enough already. And apparently, it's spreading, b/c later in the show we see Erika donning a frighteningly similar, yet smaller version of the look. Whoever told these people that this was a good look needs to be shot. In his true diva fashion, Marcellus tried to make it all about him with his fretting and whining. "If one of y'all comes down, I'm going up." Well, duh. By the way, last time I checked Marcellus, you were from Chicago. So, let’s drop the “y’all” business, b/c it is clearly just for effect. He goes on to say that Janelle's nomination speech was a backhanded slap directed at him. Yeah, "back" isn't the B word I would use to describe the slap that Janelle gave you Marcellus. News flash Marcellus, the rest of the houseguests aren't nearly as concerned with you as you like to think. Speaking of not caring, did George get evicted last week? Not that I'm complaining, but he was pretty much a non-factor in last nights show, minus his insightful guesses on the second Coup d'Etat clue. Um, yeah. Granted, the argument could be made that Chicken boy is a non-factor every week, and this week was only different in that we were spared his whining, pouting, woe-is-me nonsense.

Alright, so Will's manband has now morphed into what looks like a straight out pair of blue Hanes briefs on his head. But still, I can't get enough of this guy. Will realizes that Chill Town is in a precarious decision and needs to win the Coup d'Etat power. So, he and Boogie are not rushing to guess like many of the others. It really is refreshing to see some actual individual strategy that doesn't involve trying to align with every other person in the freaking house. I mean, there is only one winner folks. Most of you are going home empty handed. Granted, it's really not individual strategy, more of a one two Will/Boogie punch. In George's one shining moment of the night he questions the 2nd clue. Could it be the Green Giant's toothpick? Or is it a giant needle of some kind? Wow, nothing gets by this guy. I'm not quite sure if he is trying to be funny here or if he is serious. Either way, that should have been left on the cutting room floor. Anyway, I'm thinking that Chill Town is going to win this power. Whomever wins, just please don't let it be James. Because all James does is spread his spool of lies all over the house and bat those sweet little school boy eyes and everyone believes him. Will can get away with that crap, James cannot. Will is at his sexiest when he is being evil, James just comes off as annoying. Meanwhile, in the backyard, Howie is trying to explain to the group how you make rugs out of sheep. Poor Howie. I bet he spent a lot of time as a child just sitting on the floor, staring up at the ceiling fan, watching it go round and round and round. Poor, poor Howie. How can you not love the fella?

Oh good, April and her boobs are back.

I don't quite get how Danielle is all about the Legion of Doom again, when just last week they screwed her over big time. But, they pulled through for her this week, throwing the veto competition so that she could win. James' Oscar for his acting a couple weeks ago needs to be revoked, b/c it was so freaking obvious that he lost on purpose and not "on accident". (When did it become "on" accident and not "by" accident?) When crazy Scott came out, Will said to give the boy a Chill Town application? What's this? There are Chill Town applications? Sign me up please.

Finally, finally, finally, someone else said it. During his ranting and raving in the Diary room, Marcellus made the elephant-in-the-room statement of the week. Speaking of Will and Boogie he lamented, "They are gayer than I am for each other." Hmm, Erika is going to be dismayed to hear this. In yet another blatant attempt to prove his manhood, Boogie jumped at the opportunity to shower with Janelle and Erika...and Will. Gee, I wonder who he's going to choose to suds up his back on Operation Double Date?

After "winning" the POV, Danielle forces Janelle to nominate someone else. No surprises here, up goes Marcellus. And of course, Marcellus causes a scene and collapses into the chair as dramatically as possible. So now it's between him and Erika. Oh, how I hope Chill Town turns on Erika and votes to evict her. Because, I am so done with her "I'm such a key player" in this game idiocy, I'd actually choose Marcellus' non-stop robe wearing shenanigans over her. Well, if she doesn’t go home, maybe she will just flip her hair one too many times and her head will actually pop right off.

BB7 - A sheep or a lamb, will we ever know the truth?

Okay, I am so tired of all the boo-hooing that goes on when someone gets evicted. I mean, come on people, you voted Kaysar out. As Will said, "We didn't kill the guy, we just evicted him…he’s been evicted three times in one year!" And if anyone should be upset, it is Howie or Janelle, since they are the only two who voted for James. But no, instead we see Erika in tears (again) saying that Kaysar was her best friend in the house and he made her not think about the game (um, what? How is this helpful?); James saying that he was almost in tears when Kaysar left; George declaring that he really, really, really, truly, really, really liked Kaysar. Did ya, George? Really? Um, let's see, Erika voted for Kaysar seemingly without question; even Kaysar knew how she was going to vote and called her out on it last week. Then there was James, who came right out and said that Kaysar was a good secondary target and if Janey couldn't go, it had to be Kaysar. And then there is George. Apparently George is now this great strategist. I'm just not sure what his strategy is. I think it may be to just look like he has a strategy in between complaining about slop and whining about how he misses is family and just isn't cut out for the game. And suddenly everyone is saying that Kaysar had to go because he was a threat. Okay, I love me some of that Iraqi peach, but his game playing was not up to par this year. James is much more of threat. So, if they were using their little noggins, James would have been kicked to the curb.

Well, the "technological, technical difficulties" sent shock waves through the house and "Big Brother history was made!". And Janelle came out the victor. Apparently when you win HOH for the third time, the HOH bedroom decorators get the week off and the room reverts to dull, dorm-like greys and blues with zero personality. Oh wait, that's right. It was supposed to be Erika's HOH room. That makes sense. Granted, all of Erika's personal pilates prizes were removed. But, I'm afraid that even with them, that room had no hope. Janey's hair was pretty much the brightest thing in the room.

I know I pick on Erika, but I did give her credit for handling the HOH redux with grace. She said she wanted it to be fair. Even though, inside you know she was seething. However, that grace quickly disappeared after Janelle won HOH. Apparently, fair in Erika's world means that anyone but Janey win's HOH. (Well, Janelle or Howie, who are pretty much one these days, now that the S-6 alliance is going down faster than the Titanic.) News flash Erika, you may not like it that Janelle won...again. But "not fair" is when you were the HOH (for about five minutes) because of faulty buzzers.

So, Janelle's win has sent the "floatherders" into a downright tizzy. Danielle knows that her butt is on the line and James is suddenly bowing down to Janelle...right before saying that she has to go. I really hope that Janelle and Howie realize that James is full of it. But, I'm afraid that he really might have pulled the wool over their eyes. And of course they would be blind to this, b/c neither of them were familiar with this phrase. And now Erika is claiming to be from "a little town called" Chill? What is that all about? When did this happen? Could Boogie's mom have been right? Are there Boogie babies in our future? I don't think so. I'm confident that my Boogie is still all gay for Will, hence the t-shirt emblazoned with a pair of flaming red lips across his chest. I mean, it might as well have said, I <3 Will. And, let's face it, can you blame him? I say this Erika/Boogie "showmance" is all an elaborate front.

During the HOH competition, I was really disturbed by Will's half t-shirt. Something about Will going all out Wham style is unsettling. I can take these odd fashion choices from Boogie. I mean, that is part of what makes Boogie, well Boogie. You can't tell me that porn star sunglasses, terry cloth sweat bands, and tube socks don't scream Boogie. But Will? In a half shirt? Please, just stick to the cute, full-size t-shirts with funny little sayings like, "Trust me, I'm a doctor". But, it was all made clear a few scenes later when Will coordinated a little glam-rock video, complete with high heels, hoses, and instruments fashioned out of mops and wooden spoons. Now that was funny. Apparently, Will was right, putting together glam rock videos really is his little gift from God. Well, that and being one of sneakiest, funniest, most evil BB players ever, all the while making me love him more and more. I mean, not just anyone can pull off taking a shower in a sink past the age of two.

Alright enough with the white robe and matching sleep mask Marcellus. Enough! No Más! Was his suitcase lost at the airport? Is it now sitting in Tuscaloosa waiting for someone to retrieve it? Does this boy not have any clothes? I know he's lost a few belts on the show, for which he'll be invoicing Big Brother, but how about some non-sleepwear gear. Please. While we are on the subject of Marcellus, originally I was a fan of the guy. But, I'm about done with his whiney, over-the-top antics. So, Howie and Janelle were excited and jumping around like lunatics when Janelle won HOH. But, you know what? Any of these other nitwits, with the exception maybe of Chill Town, would have been doing the same damn thing. So Marcellus, enough with the drama already. You should just be happy that your prissy little butt isn't up on that block.

Is it a sheep? Or is it a lamb? Yes, this is still up for debate. I wonder how long it will take them to figure out that a lamb is a sheep? Anyway, the house guests have started ringing their little bell and darting into the confessional to make their guess. Did any of these folks listen to Chen as she explained the Coup d'Etat? (Granted, since her voice is the equivalent of the teacher in the Peanuts cartoon, who can blame them if they drowned her right out?) The answer to the Coup d'Etat challenge is a phrase COMMONLY used in the BB7 game. And these are some of the guesses those cracker jack house guests are throwing out there:

• Do not assume (which according to Erika is what DNA stands for, guess my 8th grade science teacher had that all wrong)
• Pull the wool over your eyes (obviously not a Janelle or Howie guess)
• Something about a herd (nice one Howie)
• Ewe are expected to expect the unexpected (Wacky wordplay by George. Danielle all but laughed in his face when he told her his guess)

And, why are they telling the rest of the house guests what they are guessing? Anyone ever hear about the process of elimination?

The saving grace of this episode, was that we did not have to see Chen during the redo of the HOH competition. We only had to hear her voice, and frankly, that is enough. And it proves that she brings absolutely NO value to the show. So, I ask again, can we please vote her out of the house? If not, how about the producers just put her in time out for a week, since she really should have said something about the blatant technical problems during the first competition.

I’m gunning for Janelle or Howie to win the POV. I don’t really care if Erika or Danielle goes home or if one of them is taken off the block and Marcellus or George is thrown up there. Really, I just like to see how pissed off the floatherders get whenever Janelle comes out on top.

This just in...

We've been saved! It's high drama in the BB7 household. If you thought there was something amis during last night's HOH competition, you weren't alone. Two words - Technical Difficulties. Two more words - Do Over! After contestants cried foul on the 24/7 live feed, the producers were forced to go to the video tapes. Upon review, the results were voided and Erika was ousted as HOH. Now, we can't get too excited, b/c although she is no longer HOH, we will still be subject to at least a week of her crying, holding her head in her hands, and whining about how her crown was unfairly snatched from her. And the sting can only be worse, since Janelle is the new HOH. Get out the Pepto Bismol HOH designers, the Pink Palace is back!

BB7 - Worst Birthday Ever!

The Iraqi Peach is no more. And this makes me sad. You know, it's bad enough that Kaysar got voted out too early again, but on his birthday? I mean, seriously, that completely sucks. Last year he gets this special little birthday party with a cake and this year...yeah, see ya later dude. And was it really necessary for everyone to be hollering "Happy Birthday" as he left the house? I mean, come on! “Here's some salt, please pour some into my wound. Thanks guys.” As if that mess wasn't enough, the poor guy has to then go out and endure a conversation with Chen. The guy doesn't feel bad enough already, so Chen points out that James completely screwed over the S-6 alliance and joined the Legion of Doom. (Speaking of which, what happened to Tuesday night's crumbling of this alliance and Danielle being on her own. Suddenly they are back together and all is forgotten? Did I miss something hear?) Chen then feels it necessary to remind Kaysar that last season he learned that he couldn’t trust James, but tried to make things better this season, only to find out…he couldn’t trust James. Kaysar looks crushed. So, of course, that is the perfect time to play the video from all of the house guests. A real pick-me-up if you ask me. First off, Erika crying her pretty little eyes out?! Puh-leasse! A) She voted for Kaysar and B) She voted for Kaysar!! My money says she's just hedging her bets in case he gets voted back into the house later this season. Either that, or she's trying to score a date (or just score) with Kaysar after the show wraps.

Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. I know it is standard for Chen's outfits to be hideous, but she really topped herself last night. WTF was she wearing?? That shirt looked like a converted lamp shade from an 1860's old west style bordello. I mean, it was downright distracting. Fortunately, her air time is limited. Oh, and I love when they cut back to her live spots and she's still looking off to the side rather than at the camera, then she gets all flummoxed and flubs her lines. Those teleprompters can be tricky Jules.

It was nice to see that James was being his usual backstabbing self, saying that if Janelle wasn't going home, Kaysar was the best secondary target. Nice. Yeah, Kaysar was dead on last week when he said that James wouldn't turn his back on the S-6 alliance. Way to go Kaysar. It's that type of thinking that gets you evicted on your birthday. Sure, Kaysar tried to cozy up to the remaining floaters and get their votes. But, the touchy feely, warm and fuzzy, puppies and rainbows crap doesn't work...apparently no one cares what a swell guy you are or if you've been good to them. Point proven when George voted for Kaysar, even though he was the “only person in the house to treat him like a human being.” I would like to point out to George, that if you fully embrace having the word Chicken precede your name and adorn yourself with chicken paraphernalia, people may not tend to treat you with the most respect in the world. Just saying.

I loved that we had a special Chill Town segment where we got to meet the Chill Town moms and see pictures of Will and Boogie when they were young lads. Who would have guessed that Boogie was a little chubster? Um, and a skate guard? Yes, apparently Mike was into the skate. Does this mean that his nickname comes from his days when he was down with the Roller Boogie? It does explain the head bands. I mean, those were a staple back in the days of leg warmers, the Bee Gees, and the ever popular backwards skate. I do think that Mama Boogie is a little off the wall, talking about a secret alliance between Boogie and Erika. I mean, maybe Boogie has been sending mama secret signals, ala James, to tell her this. But, something tells me that Mama B just wants to see some little baby boogies and thinks that Erika comes from a good gene pool. And then there is Will. Of course he was an adorable tyke. Could we expect anything less. Mama Will seems a little nervous for her boy, worried that Howie is, shall we say crossing the line a bit. Mama Will also seems a bit, well, crazy. But in the nicest possible way. And again, we’re told that Will is a shy person. She didn’t go so far as that other chick and say that what he really likes is sitting home and playing video games, but still. Shy? I don’t see it. While we are on the subject of Will, I must point go back to his hair for a minute. When he was in the confessional, that boy’s locks were out of control. He looked like Albert on Little House on the Prairie. Seriously crazy bowl cut going on. Bring back the manband. Please. (Fortunately, it was in full effect for the rest of the show.)

Um, can we talk about Chicken George for a minute? WTF was he wearing in the living room? It's like he went from Chicken George to Pimpified George, smoking some sort of corn-cob pipe device. First the ruffled tux/leisure suit combo for the margarita party and now this atrocity, complete w/ fake chest hair. It's disturbing really. I'm scared to see what he is going to wear to next week's prom! (And kudos to the producers for including the “Most Annoying Guest” award. You know that threw this in there just so Chicken George would get a prize. Yes folks, it’s “Everyone gets a trophy” time in the BB7 house.) And while we are on the subject of interesting fashion choices, what was on James' jacket? It looked like he had a freaking storm trooper pinned on there or something. Probably just another one of his dopey signs professing his love to Sarah. He realized that no one saw the finger crossing, so he better go the more obvious route. And what's more obvious that Storm Troopers. We all know that nothing says I love you more than Star Wars.

So, at the beginning of the show, Chen hints at a new level of the game that will...insert dramatic pause...CHANGE HOW THE GAME IS PLAYED. Will it? Really? Don't we hear this every season? Well this season it is the Coup d'Etat. If only they had had this during this week, b/c our beloved Iraqi Peach may still be in the game. But alas, no such luck. Anyway, the first clue is a Lamb (or a sheep, there was a lot of debate over this). I wasn't sure if the lamb/sheep was the clue or if that thing around his neck contained a clue. But, now I'm thinking the lamb was the clue. Either way, the poor animal looked just mortified. And it apparently hates James and <3s Howie. Smart lamb. My guess for the BB7 secret phrase is Back Doored. B/c, let's face it, they use it ALL the time. And a lamb could be a clue, kind of like, "who left the barn door open" and the lamb got out. All right, maybe I'm grasping at straws here (or hay), but that is my early on prediction.

Oh, and there was also some ridiculously lame séance segment, which was totally out of sequence, b/c Kaysar was still in it. It was like it was stuck in as an afterthought to make some sense out of the HOH competition … which Erika won. Can’t wait to see her HOH room. Welcome to Dullsville. The most unfortunate thing about Erika winning HOH is we will have to endure a lot more screen time of her flipping her hair, holding her head in her hands, no doubted crying, and just being, well, Erika.

BB7 - Santa Claus is Coming to Town

Apparently everyone is shocked by Danielle's nomination of James, except for the newly formed Legion of Doom. The remaining S-6 guests are going to feel like a gaggle of idiots when they see how they've been duped. Speaking of idiots, could they have made Marcellus look any dumber the way he was fawning over Danielle and her surprise nomination of James, going on and on about how she had them all fooled. I must give acting props to Danielle, b/c she played it off flawlessly.

James' prediction on Sunday that Janelle was the dumbest person to ever play this game was quickly disproved this week, as she was the first to figure out what was going on with James' eviction. I was disappointed in Kaysar's reaction when she approached him about the James/pawn possibility. He was pretty steadfast in believing that James would never turn on them. Um, can we hark back to last season for a minute? Yeah, that's right, James was completely loyal to their alliance last season. Okay, Kaysar, you keep on thinking that if it makes you sleep better at night.

Boogie separates himself from the rest of the boys in the house, declaring that it is the "house of the hairless men". And Boogie thinks that is just a little to met-er-o-sexual for him. Boogie has an odd habit of over-pronouncing words and adding an extra, or ex-ter-a, syllable where it doesn't belong. I first noticed it last week with his extended version of genre, gen-er-a, but thought maybe it was just a stutter or a fluke. Apparently I was giving him too much credit. Anyway, Howie seems to have found his nitch in the house of hairless men. "Janey can dye you blonde, Will can pop your zits, but if you've got unwanted hair anywhere, Howie's the guy to shave you." And devoted to his job, he clearly is as he shaves Chicken George. One word. Ew. Or as Boogie would say, E-ew.

Just when I didn't think he could get any more pathetic or whiney, George has emerged as an even stronger contender in the category of most annoying house guest ever. Shoulders hunched, eyes droopy, mouth pouty, George meagerly taps on the HOH door and cries to Danielle about how he isn't strong enough to make it to the end. She, feeling bonded to him as a parent, vows to be there for him till the end. Now, if it were any other contestant, I would think this was the greatest strategy ever. But, I think this is just George being George, no strategy involved. Sigh.

"Hey everybody, it's time for the power of veto competition." Boogie, Will, Danielle, Marcellus, James, and Janelle are competing. This week it's Will's turn to rock the porn star sun glasses and head band combo. It was an interesting competition, but in hindsight, it was easy enough to win. Well, especially b/c the Legion of Doom became the Legion of Greed. You knew they were done for when Boogie referenced the "fabulous prizes" that were up for grabs. Apparently, one Plasma TV and a trip to Aruba = no more alliance. And Will confirmed, saying that he really didn't care who went home as long as it wasn't Chill Town. Will was on to Boogie, "I know Boogie pretty well, and I'm pretty sure that Boogie is gobbling up as many prizes as he can." And oh was he right. Basically, with Chill Town, it is all about them, all of the time. And let's face it, this makes for some good tv. And in the end, it worked out well for our boys. Will pocketing $5 grand and Boogie snagging the trip to Aruba and a Plasma television. To quote our fly white boy, "I'm not sure if it's Christmas, but Santa Claus is coming to town!"

"Too bad, so sad." Janelle basically screwed everyone in the house taking away their beds, their food, their hot water. And you know what. You go girl! (I can't usually pull of a "You go girl", but nothing else fits in this situation.) I could not be happier that she won POV. Danielle was beyond pissed at her now crumbled alliance, as well she should be. James apparently didn't give a crap and threw away everything for a call from his dopey girlfriend. And Chill Town didn't care, b/c they made out like bandits. Said Will, "You know, money can't buy love. But, money can buy a lot of stuff. And I love stuff!" And I love me some Will.

How funny was Chill Town's modified "ring-ring" segment? Even without the ring-ring, those crazy cats just make me laugh every time with that bit. I'm really hoping we get a montage of that sometime this season.

WTF was up with James approaching Janelle after she won the POV? I didn't get that all. I mean, he can't be dumb enough to think she is going to realign with him? I feel like something was edited out of that part big time. Not sure how I feel about Chill Towns' plan to throw Marcellus under the bus. Part of me thinks it is brilliant, but part of me thinks it's a little despicable. Oh wait, this is Big Brother. Of course it is a little despicable. But, the way the rest of the house mates ate up the lies, it kind of makes me think they had to do it. I mean, these people are like a bunch of freaking lemmings. Danielle was the only one who didn't blindly believe Chill Town. And if these people are dumb enough to believe this crap, Go Team Chill Town.

Martyr Erika, I guess she has to play some role, decides to boycott the margarita party and suffer with the slop people. But, everyone else gets all dolled up. And, WTF was George wearing? You can't tell me he actually packed that powder blue leisure suit/ruffled tux train wreck in his suit case. Will chose the slick backed hair, which actually suits him and the satin smoking jacket, ala the Hef, declaring, "I just won $5 thousand, blamed it on Marcellus, and now I'm going to a margarita party where drunk Janelle is going to hit on me...Gotta love Big Brother All Stars!" Meanwhile, Danielle is locked in the solitary confinement room. Speaking of which, a note to Boogie, you've probably never seen a ghetto if that's the term you would use to describe that room. Yeah, the plushy pink robe and funky carpet, totally ghetto. Next we got to listen in on the nauseating phone call between James and Sarah. Is there any of that Pepto Bismol left over from when they painted Janelle's HOH room, b/c I think I'm going to need it. Sarah gushes about how she loves all the signs he's been giving her on air. Apparently, every time he crosses his fingers it means he loves her. Um, has he done this? Have we seen this? Yeah, didn't think so. I think this is just James' cover for all the finger crossing he has to do behind his back when he is talking out of both sides of his mouth.

The poor old "fake-out Marcellus routine" fell flat, b/c Danielle is apparently the only one with a brain in her head. She also kept her word to Howie, which was admirable. Though, the "I'm going to make it look like I'm putting up Howie, but really I'm putting up Kaysar" routine was a bit lame. Though, I must admit, for a split second, I did think, "Oh, snap!" (Okay, I never think "Oh, snap", it just seemed to fit here. My love for Boogie and Chill Town is clouding my brain.)

Kaysar must feel like a bit of an ass now that he realizes what is going on. He's going to be, all together now, Back Doored. Can we get an operational definition for this term please? B/c, I swear, it seems like everyone who doesn't want to go home is getting back doored. And, let's face it, who wants to go home? And if you do want to go home, what is that called, being front doored? Ugh, I hate that term. Kaysar now needs to get his game on and get some votes and kick James' butt to the curb. Might not be easy, but it's doable. What was just last week a house of some pretty good alliances, is now a can open, worms everywhere type of situation. Maybe he should sidle up to Chill Town. B/c those two boys are the tightest thing in the house right now.

BB7 - Night of 1,000 Metaphors

Web of lies, web of deceit, Black Widow, tangled web...will it never end? If for nothing else than them beating the spider reference to death, I wanted this HOH to be over. But, I'm sure we aren't done. No doubt Chenbot will bring it up at least once more on Thursday night.

Will, in a moment that made me love him even more, called out the rest of the house guests as they were all sad about Diane's eviction. Thank goodness someone did! I mean, they all, minus Marcellus, voted her out of the house. Let's drop the mopey faces and leave them to Chicken George.

"This HOH was tailor made for Beefcake, Hurricane, Jedi Howie." Classic Howie, with his cap askew. Now, I didn't realize this at the time, but the producers clearly put this in as a sign of things to come. Things being the pounds that Howie has apparently been packing on. "Howie's not a little boy, Howie's a big boy." "Big Boy likes sandwiches." "Big boy likes foam" What I don't get is that he really doesn't look all that different to me. Maybe his stomach is a little softer, but was there really a need for Danielle's food intervention? Puh-lease! I mean, if anything, Howie was being pretty strategic. Like a bear preparing for hibernation, Howie was preparing for being put on the slop diet. But anyway, Danielle doesn't see it this way and she pulls Howie aside for a talk, explaining how she is worried about how out of control it is when he comes to food. Seriously. I mean, it's not like he's hooked on the juice or boozing it up or smoking crack, he's not even smoking cigarettes for Pete's sake. And he is in no immediate danger of having to be sawed out of the house and buried in a piano crate. I mean, let's all just settle down.

Anyway, the HOH competition continues. Will throws it, in hopes to get the $10K egg...he doesn't. But, it was really worth it to hear his summation of the challenge, "I'm not the smartest guy in the world, but at least I'm not sitting on a spider web for 50 hours waiting for a freaking rotten egg." Go Team Will! Other than this gem, I was disappointed with the lack of Will time in last night's episode. It was clearly much more James-centric. And I'm kind of done with James. Actually, I'm secretly hoping that the Legion of Doom's plan backfires and James is dunzo. His tough talk, I'm going take Janelle down, blah, blah, blah is becoming taxing to say the least. Of course, the fact that he won the veto nullification vote doesn't really help matters.

So, it came down to Howie, Danielle, and Erika as the final three in the HOH competition. George, in a move of great stupidity, knew there was only the Slop Pass egg left, but didn't drop. So, Marcellus dropped and gets the pass. What does George do? Drops two seconds later. Idiot. Danielle starts to give up and then changes her mind. The only reason this is of note is Boogie yelling "Holla" in the background. There's just something funny about a white boy in a head band and super long shorts yelling Holla that makes me laugh. Holla! So, Jedi Howie holds on as long as he can, but after promises of safety from the remaining two gals, he drops. I guess all that excess weight finally got to him. In the end, Erika handed the HOH to Danielle. Without missing a beat, Erika has taken Diane's roll as the biggest dud in the house. Honestly, I forgot she was even in the competition till Danielle asked her for the HOH. And since when does being a flight instructor make you good at a challenge that involves hanging on ropes and being squirted with shaving cream? I mean, if she had said she was some sort of trapeze flying porn star maybe, but a flight instructor? **

Apparently the five minutes that Will was on the spider web have taken their toll. Inside, Will is experiencing some major back pain. This is where I would have pretty much tackled the rest of the house guests to relieve him of his pain. But, no, Kaysar steps in. And once again, the show reverts to cheap man-on-man action. A half naked Will topped by a half naked Count Chocula, trying to crack his back. The highlight of this scene is when Howie walks in and explains that he thought they finally lost Will and wondered what would happen to his vote now that he had finally bit the dust. I'm guessing this is kind of a payback for Will calling Howie a bloated, half-dead, diabetic manatee. In my book, Will one that game.

Just when I thought George couldn't get more annoying and pathetic, the rest of the house gets pizza. And George, having given up the slop card, pouts like a five year old child. His pouting is really starting to make me uncomfortable. And I wanted to slap Marcellus for giving him that pass. Can we please vote George off? Please. I'm sick of the whining, farting, pouting, patheticness that is Chicken George. Eye of the tiger my ass.

In the end, Danielle put up Janelle and James. You know James wasn't happy about this. And if it backfires and he gets the boot, he might just rue the day he referred to Janelle as an Anna Nicole Smith wannabe who was the dumbest person to play the game. If Chill Town pulls through, and I think they just might, I think James is on the first bus back to his boring Sarah, perhaps with a stop to see Diane along the way.

** Upon some further investigation from my ace fact checker, Erika is a pilates instructor, not a flight instructor. This makes more sense. Note to self, on BB7 nights, no more than two glasses of wine allowed.